Monday, August 23, 2010

Ten Buckets of Vomit

I know that is a disgusting title and I apologize if anyone reading this just ate or drank or has the flu, but that's how I feel...like ten buckets of vomit.

I don't know what happened. I was feeling so peaceful thinking boy this forgiveness really works. I even had visions of sugar plums dancing through my mind, and then shlazam, it's like I tripped and fell all the way to hell.

Where's the easy button?

I have lots and lots of things that I am trying to blame for this sudden decent into the depths of darkness, yet the secret of salvation is but this that I am doing this unto myself.

Really?

Well then...straight from the Course's mouth (paraphrasing):

I must have decided wrongly because I am not at peace.
Since I made the decision I can decide otherwise.
I do not feel guilty because the Holy Spirit will undo all the consequences of my wrong decision if I will let Him.
I choose to let Him by allowing Him to decide for God for me.

3 comments:

  1. Dear Dawn -
    Sorry that you're dealing with this darkness.

    May the light come through to your mind at the earliest (and while I'm at it, let me wish it for myself too - it's been a bit of a struggle for me these past few days as well, lightened somewhat by Mikey's note to me on your previous entry - thanks, Mike)
    take care,
    anil

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  2. Lions, and tigers and bears! Oh, my! And the wizard wasn't a wizard really after all... and the answer was always right there in my mind just as shiny as the red sparkly shoes on my feet. click, click, click... there's no place like home! Peace be with you... with love from Dorothy

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  3. Thanks guys! Thanks ten million. I'm working on it. This can certainly seem like a difficult process. I'm thankful to have you to share it with. There's nothing better than like minds who truly understand. It was a treat to hear from both of you and Mikey who emailed me privately first thing this morning. Good night all!

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